Immediately Stop Doing These 7 Things to Improve Your Life
We all have things that we are currently doing either consciously or unconsciously that can have a negative impact and be a detriment to our overall happiness and quality of life. Below are 7 of the most popular things that many of us do that have no positive impact on our life. If you stop doing these 7 things, your quality of life will tremendously improve and you will find yourself a more happy person.
Stop:
- Doubting yourself
- Caring what others think
- Being indecisive
- Trying to be somebody you’re not
- Ghosting people
- Being so hard on yourself
- Bad habits
1. Doubting Yourself
You are awesome! Say it with me, I am awesome. Everybody has their own personality, quirks, and life experiences that make them unique and who they are today. You should take pride in knowing that your past experiences have morphed you into the person you currently are. You overcame the negative you were faced with as well as took advantage of the positive opportunities you were presented with.
Still, too often we continue to doubt ourselves. There are many reasons this can happen such as bad experiences in the past that hurt our confidence. Whatever the reason is, it is hard to be successful in life if you do not believe in yourself and your abilities. Two things I tell myself whenever I feel unsure of myself are:
- “If everyone else can do it, so can I.”
- “Every decision I have ever made and everything I have ever done has led me to this point in my life and it has all turned out ok so far”.
Reminding myself of these 2 concepts whenever I am beginning to doubt myself has helped me find a new surge of confidence and made me feel ready to take on any challenges that await me.
Another helpful reminder is to make sure you are prepared for the task at hand. You will feel utterly more confident and ready to take on the responsibility if you know you did everything you could possibly do to prepare. Remember, there is a difference between nervous anxiety and doubting your ability to get the job done.
2. Caring What Others Think
Considering the opinions of those you are close with such as friends and family is typically a good idea, especially for big decisions. However, don’t let other people dictate your life. Life is short and tomorrow is not promised, so do what you love with no regrets and to the fullest of your ability.
3. Being Indecisive
As you can see from the post above, I used to be extremely indecisive. In fact, it was arguably my biggest weakness. Those involved in the world of zodiacs would say it is because I am a Libra – our sign being a scale we are notorious for weighing all the options and being indecisive. I’m not sure if I believe in all that, but I certainly know it was true for me.
One thing that has helped me stop being indecisive is to:
Make quick decisions on unimportant choices.
Things such as “what do you want for dinner?” It is so easy for anyone to say they’re unsure, go through all the different cuisine options, and drive everyone crazy, including yourself, trying to decide where to eat. Do I want Mexican? Thai? Italian food? No, I had Italian last week. You end up spending way too much brainpower trying to make a decision on something that really doesn’t matter all too much. Instead, make the decision quickly. Like in 10-15 seconds. Yeah, that quick.
Will it always be an amazing decision? No. But at least now you will learn for next time and it won’t have any impact on your life by tomorrow morning. As you get better at making fast, small decisions eventually you will be able to make fast, big decisions.
Another thing that may help when it comes to being indecisive is to remember:
You can always change your decision!
Nothing in life is final until it is, and you will more often than not have plenty of time to change your decision. Make a quick choice based on your knowledge (don’t doubt yourself) and your gut, and then do an in-depth evaluation of the options later on. Don’t flip flop back and forth though. If you do this it doesn’t matter how quickly you made your decision, you will still be indecisive. Stick by your decision unless you have overwhelming evidence to change it.
4. Trying to be Somebody You’re Not
There are few things more liberating than being comfortable in your own skin and confident in the person you are. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses will empower you to become successful and the best version of yourself. It also allows you to be authentic and form more genuine and powerful relationships. You will be comfortable doing the things you truly love and being the person you truly are, which will lead to a happier life.
5. Ghosting People
In today’s world of technology, social media, and dating apps, ghosting has become somewhat of a common trend. If you are not familiar with ghosting, ghosting is when the person you are talking to randomly stops talking to you one day without any explanation. This can happen in friendships, but two places it is extremely common in nowadays is with:
- Dating
- Job Hunting
When it comes to dating, ghosting has become super popular mainly due to how prominent online communication is. The problem with ghosting is that it leaves the person getting ghosted with no closure. They don’t know what they did wrong, which also means theoretically they cannot work on improving themselves in that department. It can also make them feel even worse than if you told them the truth because they are left with that empty feeling of just not knowing. Ghosting can also be bad for the person doing it long-term as it creates an avoidance mentality that can carry over into other aspects of their life.
Click here for 15 awesome texts to send instead of ghosting someone.
Now, I know some people ghost because they are afraid of the other person’s reaction. The other person may get angry and not act rationally. However, you run the risk of this happening even if you ghost them. After a handful of text messages with no reply, they may start acting irrationally and cursing you out anyway. (At least this proves you dodged a bullet). I would suggest being cordial with them at first and try showing compassion.
Job hunting is surprisingly the other place where ghosting comes up way too often. After talking to a potential employer for weeks, you just stop hearing from them. Personally, I believe after even one interview a company should not be ghosting anyone. Give the person the courtesy of letting them know you will not be moving forward. The risk of running into crazy, irrational responses is far, far less than dating, and there really is no excuse for doing so. If you work for HR or you are a hiring manager, recruiter, or anybody involved in the hiring process:
Do. Not. Ghost. Candidates.
6. Being So Hard On Yourself
We will all have bad days and make mistakes. For example, lately, I have been missing days of meditation. However, instead of beating myself up for it, I accept that I am human and acknowledge that my life has been busy lately. I have been traveling and thrown off my normal routine. That doesn’t mean making excuses – it is still my fault for missing the meditations – it means being okay with not being perfect.
If you mess up at something, make a mistake, don’t do it the way you planned to or something just goes terribly wrong within or without your control – that’s totally fine.
You are a strong person, and you can always bounce back from it. Acknowledge it happened and take the steps to prevent it from happening again – but just beating yourself up about it won’t do anybody any good.
7. Bad Habits
Smoking, excessive drinking, binge eating, compulsive lying…the list goes on and on when it comes to bad habits. Doing anything that harms your physical or mental health long term just isn’t worth it.
“The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today.”
The same thing applies to cutting your bad habit. Start today to take the steps and END your bad habit!
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Have you found yourself guilty of doing any of these things recently or in the past? Let me know in the comments or directly at eric@ericgolban.com
Best,
Eric
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